thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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