i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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