Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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