It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Randomize
