Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
its liver damage thursday
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