If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
