But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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