garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
