so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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