she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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