she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
