Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
