if i can run in heels then i can drive
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
