glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
