I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
