and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
