well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
