I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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