In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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