It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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