That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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