The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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