I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
