You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
