Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Randomize
