they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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