So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
