the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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