Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm sobbing to NWA
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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