Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
