I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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