i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
is wine microwaveable?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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