remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
birth control should be required to get into college
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
