what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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