My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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