I only kidnapped one of them. chill
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Randomize
