then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize