you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
