Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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