She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It's just like the Real World with babies
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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