Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
