How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
