it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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