I just cut my nipple shaving
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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