Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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