Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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