I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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