But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Randomize
