When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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