Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize