Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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